Lightbulb Theft Up 40%

(5/13/23) Vista Point, CA

Serial Lightbulb Thief Strikes Community Theater

Residents of Tiny Farse, California woke up this morning to the grim news of a cancelled opening night for the highly controversial play, Romeo and Juliet.

Was it the Lightbulb Thief, or was it a conservative copycat? Due to recent protests, calling for the cancelation of William Shakespeare’s racy outdated writings, investigators are interested in questioning local ‘social club’ members for more information.

Witnesses with information that might lead to the capture of the perpetrator, are encouraged to contact the police helpline with their bright ideas at 1-800-555-3153.